Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Sometimes it's better not to think

I believe I may have another addiction....blogging and reading blogs.  I'm finding it takes up an incredible amount of time each day reading and posting and I'm wondering if this a good use of time.  I may have mentioned before that I'm a bit obsessive about many things and blogging has been added to that list.

Having learnt over the years that I need to think about where my black times come from, analyse thought patterns etc, I find that sometimes I can over think.  Is there such a thing?  For me there is.  A part of the fun of blogging for me is discovering new people, new ideas, people who share similar interests etc.  Yesterday I discovered a blog by a 30 year old something mum who seems to run her own business, has had 4 children in about 5 years, the most recent addition is only about 2 weeks old.  Her hubbie is about to start a new job and will be living away from home during the week.  I had to stop reading about this particular family's life as I found it stressful just thinking about it.  Silly me went back for another look today and I got stressed all over again.

I think I have just learnt a very valuable lesson here.  There is a time when I need to switch of from those things I have no need to think about.  I would love to send this lovely lady messages of encouragement, see how she is coping but I just can't do it.  One of the reasons I think is that I had such a stressful time when my girls were babies.  I had severe post natal depression, anxiety, panic attacks, basically the lot.  Even though this lady seems to be doing very well, I find myself thinking about how hard it must be for her, and I just can't afford to think about that.  Does that make me weird or just very sensitive?  Don't think it matters either way really, I just need to look after my head space.

Perhaps I should limit my time on the computer each day too as at the moment I feel like it might be taking over my life.  I wonder if I'll manage to implement this change.   No too hopeful on that one.  Some obsessions are just so enjoyable. :-)

Anne

11 comments:

  1. Funny but this reminds me of my PTSD episode a couple of weeks ago. I really thought I couldn't face the situation again but by the time I had been placed in the same room as the husband and wife for the third time I was beginning to cope with it. If I hear anything about her I still immediately relate it to my own experience but without the strength of worry I started with a few weeks ago. On the other hand, there just are some situations we are not ready to cope with yet and only you can know how you feel. I use the net way too much for a normal person but I don't watch telly or movies and I use it in fits and starts - time on the net then a few minutes of folding or vac half the lounge floor etc. The net in small doses can actually make me more productive as otherwise I would just go to sleep when I am too tired or shaking. This way I have a fun break, regroup and can manage another 5 or 20 minutes. Cherrie

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  2. Oh how I can understand what you are saying here. Been there and got the T-shirt!! Only with me I found and sometimes still do that reading about such people makes me feel a total failure because I couldn't do it!! However I am coming to realise that we are all different and we really mustn't judge ourselves by someoneelse's standards. I look at my two cats brother and sister and one could be a gold medalist in relaxation and nothing fazes him but his siter is such a nervous little cat and everything stresses her and so if they can be so different why should we think we are the same? That lady is probably fine and one of the symptoms of your (and my) problem is that we are often over sensitive and things get to us. Try not to annalyse everything so much - hark who's talking!

    I am with you on the blogging bit too and sometimes wish I had never started as I can be obsessive about checking other blogs and looking to see if anyone has commented.

    We are all different but some of us are the same if you see what I mean?!!

    Jane x

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  3. See, I knew I couldn't stay away from the computer for long. :-)

    Cherrie, I like the fact that you use the net to actually help yourself achieve more. That sounds to me like you are using it as a tool and you are in control. It must be very hard dealing with physical symptoms like shaking.

    Jane, I think you got it in one by saying we are over sensitive. I know I was as a child, even fearful and I don't think I've grown out of that yet. Maybe we blog a bit too much, but here we are discussing and sharing some of our most difficult life situations and that's surely a good and positive thing. It's sure made a difference to me knowing there are other people who understand and care.
    Thanks ladies for sharing your perspectives and experiences.
    Anne xx

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  4. I don't think feeling like that makes you weird, it makes you a human being and I think you are right, it's probably best to limit time reading things that make you stressed You have to look after yourself, that's the most important thing.
    Take care,
    Sue

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  5. Just reading the line "4 kids in 5 years, newest being 2 weeks old"...makes me think how incredibly tired she must feel. How amazing she must be, to mange her mothering time since the husband travels. I'm hooked to the blogs too so don't feel too bad. Warm wishes from Tokyo, Japan!

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  6. I always say to people I've an addictive personality I hasten to add that I've never been a smoker or took drugs, what I mean is that I have current obsession, very few seem to last as I've hopped onto something else.

    As you know it's the weight loss for me at the moment, I'm hoping it will become habit before i lose momentum.

    I too get inspired by blogs and generally look for crafty/ arty blogs to lift my spirits. I view blog reading like reading magazines, but I can choose the content.IYSWIM

    xxx

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  7. I like that, blog reading is like reading magazines. It's cheaper than buying magazies too but does that stop my buying them? Nope!! :-) I really enjoy reading everyone's comments to my posts because there are different ways of looking at things, it really helps me. Thank you.

    Anne

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  8. I think it's hard for anyone, addictive personality or not, to limit time on blog reading.
    After getting disgruntled with myself because I was spending too much time on the computer when I should be doing other things I've now whittled my favourite list down to half a dozen blogs. I've stopped veering off to other blogs listed in sidebars and visit my half dozen favourites only.
    It was relatively easy to whittle down the list by deciding which blogs I actually looked forward to visiting. I deleted lots and added a couple. Now I do my blog visiting when I sit down for a cup of tea, after a visit and a virtual "chat" I switch off and get on with something else.
    It wasn't easy at first and I had to make a conscious effort to switch off after the half dozen visits but since doing it I've felt much freer and have so much more time to do other things.
    I also used to be a "lurker" (such a horrid term!)but now I comment on the blogs I visit. It all seems more meaningful and worthwhile, rather than the mindless flitting about.
    I don't know about whether bloggers blog too much as I've never had one but I do know that the half a dozen I visit are regular bloggers which I enjoy, something new to read when I visit.
    I don't know if any of this helps, we're all so individual in our internet usage, but it's definitely helped for me to cut down, freer in mind and spirit without the constant thought that I should be tuning in to blog world.
    So many more hours in the day!
    Eve x

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  9. P.S. You're obviously on my half dozen list!
    Have a great weekend,
    Eve x

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  10. Eve, Thankyou for your helpful comments. You are very disciplined to have limited the blogs you read. I feel honoured that I'm on that list. :-)
    Enjoy your weekend too,
    Anne xx

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  11. Hi Anne,
    I found it very hard at first, and it took time before the 'withdrawal' symptoms subsided. But if I can do it anyone can - discipline isn't one of my strongest attributes!
    Eve x

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