I believe I may have another addiction....blogging and reading blogs. I'm finding it takes up an incredible amount of time each day reading and posting and I'm wondering if this a good use of time. I may have mentioned before that I'm a bit obsessive about many things and blogging has been added to that list.
Having learnt over the years that I need to think about where my black times come from, analyse thought patterns etc, I find that sometimes I can over think. Is there such a thing? For me there is. A part of the fun of blogging for me is discovering new people, new ideas, people who share similar interests etc. Yesterday I discovered a blog by a 30 year old something mum who seems to run her own business, has had 4 children in about 5 years, the most recent addition is only about 2 weeks old. Her hubbie is about to start a new job and will be living away from home during the week. I had to stop reading about this particular family's life as I found it stressful just thinking about it. Silly me went back for another look today and I got stressed all over again.
I think I have just learnt a very valuable lesson here. There is a time when I need to switch of from those things I have no need to think about. I would love to send this lovely lady messages of encouragement, see how she is coping but I just can't do it. One of the reasons I think is that I had such a stressful time when my girls were babies. I had severe post natal depression, anxiety, panic attacks, basically the lot. Even though this lady seems to be doing very well, I find myself thinking about how hard it must be for her, and I just can't afford to think about that. Does that make me weird or just very sensitive? Don't think it matters either way really, I just need to look after my head space.
Perhaps I should limit my time on the computer each day too as at the moment I feel like it might be taking over my life. I wonder if I'll manage to implement this change. No too hopeful on that one. Some obsessions are just so enjoyable. :-)